Motherhood — A Feminist Issue?

Mack // Shere Hite, a sex researcher famous for the Hite Report in 1976, was featured in an article in the Times about the debate over motherhood and the right to bear children.

Hite’s view is that motherhood is a feminist issue and women should have the right to bear children at any age. When asked if she would now consider having children at the age of 67, her answer was “Maybe”.

Hite’s main issue with discrimination over late parenthood is how women are scolded as being selfish while men are congratulated. “’Every birth should be celebrated,’ she insists”.

I agree that every birth should be celebrated, and I think that this is what happens. Everyone loves babies and coos and pinches their cheeks regardless of the age of the parents.

Hite also says that “Men don’t like women taking reproduction into their own hands because it has for so long been a male preserve. Late motherhood puts women in charge. It’s all about ownership of women.”

I disagree. Men do not dislike women having babies at a later age because they want exclusive ownership of their wombs.

In my point of view, since the advent of birth control, men have had very little control over women’s wombs. It’s up to women to take their birth control pills, women get to choose if they abort or keep the baby, and women can do all of this in secret if they choose. Even before modern birth control there were always medicine women known for procuring herbs that cause abortion, and there is a long history of natural methods for contraception.  Granted, there are cultures where women have less control over their fertility (I’m thinking of those where women can’t leave the house without their father or husband’s permission), but my guess would be that if you talked to those women and saw inside their social networks you would see that they also have secretive ways of controlling their fertility.

In the end, it all comes down to resources and our animal desire to reproduce the most viable number of children. When resources are scarce there are usually more children to help make money for the family and ensure that at least some of them live to reproduce themselves. And in rich areas there are usually fewer children with more investment put into each giving them a higher chance of survival.

I do not think the right to have children is a feminist issue. I think it is a human issue and men and women alike have the right to have children. But I also think that people need to be honest with themselves and their partners about their ability to care for their children financially, physically, and emotionally.  If someone wants to have children they should be aware of this and make it happen as soon as they are able (i.e. have enough resources to support the child). And, if a woman is nearing the point in her life where she is unable to physically care for a child for up to 20 years, perhaps she should look into surrogate motherhood, sperm donors, or choosing to be a single parent – all of which might be a better choice than pushing 70 when her child is still in high school.

I also think that it is essential to understand the limitations of being human and how our sex affects our reproductive lives. Women cannot have children as late into their lives as men. This is a biological fact and it has nothing to do with repression of women, it is simply how our bodies have evolved. We need to respect our biological limitations and work with them to provide the best lives for our children as we are able.