Breast Milk And Sex

Dear Madame X,

My wife has begun to lactate. We are managing to keep our sex lives quite active through sleepless nights etc. I enjoy breast-play, but sometimes the milk gets in my mouth. She assures me that it’s safe, but she’s so worried about me not being attracted to her (my wife is still hot), she would say anything to keep the sex going. Is it ok?

Skinny on Breast Milk

Dear Skinny,

Staying sexually attracted to each other during pregnancy is something that concerns a lot of couples. There are a lot of issues around pregnancy that can damper a couple’s sex life (changing body shape, lack of libido, new body aches and pains, nausea, hormonal changes, and many more) but you seem to be able to overcome this which is good if an active sex life is important to you both.

In terms of drinking breast milk from your wife, there is no need to be concerned. It is perfectly fine for you to ingest.

The only potential concern would be if she is HIV positive leading to a risk to the child. Most prenatal clinics offer an HIV test during routine check-ups (because any pregnant woman would have had unprotected sex which is a risk of sexually transmitted infections). HIV can be passed on through breast milk from mother to child and so HIV clinics recommend HIV positive mothers do not breast feed their children, but use formula instead. They would also recommend HIV positive mothers take medication during pregnancy to prevent transmission.

In terms of you getting HIV through her breast milk, there have been no documented cases of getting it way.

As such, there is no need to be concerned about how her breast milk might affect your health and you can feel free to continue enjoying her ever-growing breasts.

You say that your wife worries that you are not attracted to her, yet you say she is still hot. It might be a good idea to talk with your wife about how you and she feel about your sex life. There will be a lot of changes to your sex life from now on, and it is important to have open communication with your wife. If you are both able to express your needs and desires and find ways to support each other through this challenging life stage then your bond will be stronger for it.

As well, if you find you are struggling with a discrepancy in your sexual desires, as many couples do before and after childbirth, there are some great books and great counsellors out there who specialise in these topics. Email me and I can recommend some to you if you would like.

Best of luck with the baby.

This article will appear every Wednesday to spice up your week.

Please email me with any and all questions about sex and relationships and I will answer them in this column.