How To Turn Naughty Little Boys Into Men

“If we want more good men in the world, we must start treating boys with less blame and more understanding.”

This is the purpose of Raising Boys; to try to understand what makes boys tick, why they are different from girls, and how we can raise them to become good men. It shows the reader why it’s okay that boys are different from girls, and how we can understand this and respect it. The book definitely succeeds.

It is an easy book to read with lots of tips on what parents can do to help their boys. Biddulph explains how testosterone influences their brains and bodies and how to deal with some of the problems this might cause. For example, how to teach boys to understand their strength, how their brain structure affects the way they learn in school, how puberty affects their behaviour, and how to develop a healthy sex life.

The chapter on sex is one of my favourites. Biddulph explains how parents can help initiate their boys into puberty with a rite of passage. He thinks that this rite of passage might be one of the things missing in our society today and one of the causes for poor relations between the sexes. Without this clear break between childhood and adulthood he thinks many boys may not learn how to relate to women as an adult and forever have a child-like relationship with the women they meet. He talks about how to help boys have healthy relationships with women and how to respect their mothers.

Within this chapter there are also sections on how to deal with “the creep factor”, homosexual and transgender boys, and how to influence positive sexual behaviour through talking about masturbation and pornography.

The main criticism of this book is that it leaves single mothers feeling like they’re not good enough and doomed to failure. Because a father influence is so important for boys, there is a chapter on “Mothers and sons”, which recommends choosing men to be role models for the boy (also recommended for two-parent families, but even more so for single mothers). But in spite of this chapter I still left the book feeling like if I were a single mother I would struggle to raise a good boy. Granted, this is a simple overview of how to raise boys, and there are perhaps more in-depth discussions in his other books. But it would have been better if he could have recommended some other sources for single mothers to go to for help with their boys.

Steve Biddulph obviously a feminist. The whole book is full of information about how to have healthy respect for women and how both parents play important roles in the lives of their boys.

“We started liberating girls thirty years ago, and we are now liberating boys too…The world needs rounded and fully human people – not more robots for ‘work and war’. And we are raising our boys and girls to be free thinking and questioning, with clear heads and strong hearts”.

Biddulph is famous for his work with child psychology and especially boys. He was even voted Australian Father of the Year in 2000 for his work. This book is a great introduction to raising boys and definitely deserves the credit it has been given.