TLC: Teeming With Little Children

TLC used to stand for “The Learning Channel” but I think it ought to change it’s name to “Teeming with Little Children.”

We all know about Kate Gosselin and her brood of 8 children, but that is hardly the only fount of kiddie chaos.

The Duggars stars in 19 Kids and Counting. As part of the Quiverful movement, they believe that children are a blessing from God and that birth control should not be used.

Table for 12 shows us Eric and Betty Hayes, along with their 10 children.

Quints by Surprise is new this season and we get to watch the Jones family with their 6 newborn children.

If you are like me the idea of popping out 19 kids in a row, or 6 kids at once, is not the most pleasurable. However TLC has the answer — polygamy!

In Sister Wives we meet Kody Brown, his three blonde wives and their 13 kids. They all live in Utah, and (surprise, surprise) are fundamentalist Mormons. Oops! Sorry he just married his fourth, so we meet her as well (and there is no doubt she will also contribute to the brood).

My opinion of polygamy aside, this new show made me think about what exactly TLC is trying to teach us. Five of their shows are devoted to exceptionally large families. These are heart-warming stories which star the mother who has sacrificed to raise these children. She is the hero, and is always a stay at home mom.

But motherhood is not the only feminine state the show advocates, because being a wife can be just as rewarding.

The channel has five shows about weddings, not including the flower and cake shows that frequently feature the receptions. Add to that six shows about home design, four shows about how to look your best and six shows about cooking and you basically have their whole line-up.

I would suggest that the station was now run by Quiverful Mormons, if I didn’t suspect that was against their religion.

The image of womanhood presented on TLC is a happy, fecund home-maker with an impeccable house and clothing to match. Perhaps the channel should change it’s name to WIFE*

*Wash, Iron, Fuck, Etc.