Should Women Fear The Bachelor Party?

There are boatloads of beer, naked women and a general testosterone overload. It just sounds like your regular, mostly harmless frat party, right?

Wrong.

If you’re going to marry a man, chances are that you trust him. However, what we know in our gut can sometimes be overpowered by what we see, read and hear. In this case, the message to women is clear: “Bachelor parties are BAD NEWS.”

Women have bachelorette parties, and although some shady activity is bound to go down at some of these too, it’s more common for us to talk about the partying, lying and cheating that is part and parcel of the bachelor party — a man’s last hurrah and farewell to his freedom.

Recently, I read a Marie Claire article and was instantly filled with a sense of dread. They basically said that stags give men a licence to cheat. They admit that some men feel remorse and run back “into the arms of their fiancées,” but they also make it clear that men are expected to cheat on their wives-to-be. They feel pressure from their friends — friends that are probably your friends too!

We even get to hear from a man who succumbed to this pressure: “When a girl is literally unzipping your pants, men can’t say no. We’re not built that way.” I didn’t know that willpower flies out the window during a bachelor party.

Seriously, guys. If you’re engaged, you’re unavailable. As in not free… unless you have some alternate arrangement of course.

It just seems to me that bachelor parties are going too far. In the UK, men are flying to Eastern Europe for their stag parties. Apparently, the beer is cheaper and they have entire companies which run on helping men plan whole weekends of drunken revelry. Is there less guilt if you’re unfaithful in another area code?

While men in Western countries may not fly as far as Europe, they’re going on similar all-weekend party binges in places like Las Vegas. Recently, basketball star Chris Bosh had an “four-day bachelor bash” there as well as Nick Lachey. Bosh’s blowout is being referred to as “The Hangover III,” according to the New York Post. As for Lachey, there’s no gossip that he did anything out of the ordinary “drink-your-face-off-one-last-time party,” but the pictures of him by the pool popping a champagne cork with bikini-clad women in the background could be enough to make his girlfriend cringe.

Fortunately, most women don’t have to witness the whole affair in pictures splashed all over the Internet and can pretend that it was just another weekend of partying that came and went. No big deal. But what a relief that it’s over.

Of course there’s lots of good men out there who just want to have a good time like their fiancées do at their bachelorette party. Women go to party shops to clean them out of everything in the form of a penis and men make jokes about the ball and chain all night. Much better.

I know it’s difficult with the Hangover movies telling us how crazy bachelor parties can get, but we must keep faith and hold on tight to our trust. For one night (or a four-day weekend), we must brace ourselves and not let the bad reviews of bachelor parties infiltrate our brains. Plus if you’re celebrating that weekend too, it’s just a buzz kill.

If you’re going to trust him for the rest of your life, may as well start with this weekend.

Contact the author here: tinybart@morningquickie.com