The Devil Made Me Do It

For those of us who have seen The Exorcist, it’s hard not to believe in satanic possession. But we are skeptical when it’s used as an excuse for inappropriate and especially illegal behaviour.

Bobby Guyton, a 77-year-old man from Glendale, Arizona, sexually assaulted a woman and justified his actions by telling authorities “Satan must have got a hold of him.” On four separate occasions, the devil made him force his maid to touch his penis.

That’s right, we’re talking about four counts of demonic possession leading to forced fondling. And even before the inappropriate touching, his maid told police that she felt uncomfortable on other occasions while cleaning his place due to “sexual comments.” It seems that the devil has decided to reside for awhile in this man. Should someone call an exorcist?

When he was ambushed with the confrontation call set up by Glendale police on Tuesday, at first he said that he wasn’t sure why he forced her to touch him. It was only after further probing that he admitted “Satan had gotten into him.” I thought the devil was supposed to be clever, but it seems he’s rather confused.

Guyton also told police that “he felt sorry for himself because he hasn’t gotten laid since 1980.” So what was it? Sex assault is certainly devilish behaviour, but it does seem that he’s a desperate and lonely man past his prime who thought that he could take advantage of the help.

Not only did he keep changing his mind about what happened and why, but his wacky story about being under the influence of the devil was all that police needed to book him for one count of sexual abuse.

He can now battle all his demons…in jail.

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