Real Life 40-Year-Old Virgin Sues The Joking Jerks

We all know and (probably) loved the blockbuster hit The 40-Year-Old Virgin. The story goes something like this:  he is a virgin at age 40, all of his co-workers make fun of him once they find out, he falls in a love with a woman and they wind up happily married, dancing around the screen to “Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In” as the credits roll. Not the worst outcome. But, for real life  41-year-old virgin Kristen Haight, who is suing her past employer for 45 million dollars, her story didn’t pan out exactly the same way.

Kristen was a pediatric nurse at NYU Langone Medical Center, who was constantly teased for her alleged virginity. Maybe she is just asexual and simply uninterested! But, her office apparently still got a kick out of the torment. One man, Dr. Jeffrey Wisoff allegedly quoted a line from the popular film,  saying that sex was “like petting something furry for the first time.” Sounds pretty professional to me.

She unfortunately found out that she had endometriosis, a condition where uterine cells form outside of the uterus. Naturally, when dealing with something like this, the sex and reproductive life of the woman is sure to be put on file. So, she feared that the information would get out to her office mates, giving them the satisfaction that she was, in fact, a virgin dealing with endometriosis at the time. She begged for the staff to keep her information a secret. Too bad adults and medical professionals place more importance on humour than privacy.

The information spread through the office like wildfire, and everyone was made aware of Kristen’s medical information and sexual status. After the drama, supervisors forced her to take a sick leave and eventually, she was fired.

It is hard to envision a 41-year-old woman being treated like a little girl in the school yard, being made fun of for something so personal and private. But then getting fired because of the alleged actions of her coworkers? That is just downright cruel. At least she may be making $45 million out of the deal.

Contact the author here: crazycolleen@morningquickie.com