Women And Their Pussies

As a little girl I understood that not all people had a family member who was a cat, but I assumed this was because they were “allergic,” a horrifying disease that doomed people to a life segregated from the feline. I envisioned these desperate people who had been stricken with “the allergy” as spending their evenings quietly weeping on their knees in front of a shrine of Cat Fancy pull-out posters and porcelain ornaments of fluffy, white cats kitty-death-gripping balls of yarn.

My misconceptions were largely a result of being raised by a passionate cat-man who had an extensive history of whispering feral barn cats, but my naïveté naturally waned as I grew older, and when I became a single, condo inhabiting woman with two adopted cats, I immediately became perceived as the crazy, romantically-incapable cat lady who had a dry vagina and an addiction to the television show Coronation Street.

The association between women and the feline goes way back. In ancient Egypt cats were worshiped and believed to be in close contact with gods, similar to the association made between women and the Madonna figure. In juxtaposition to the conflicting ideas surrounding feminine identity, cats were also perceived as demonic entities, similar to how untamed women have been recognized as whores. During the Salem Witch Trials of 1692, cats were identified as the witch’s evil-peddling side-kick, and they were consequently burned and drowned alongside those who were suspected of witch craft.

The feline continues to be associated with modern notions of femininity, and this relationship is demonstrated through common slang. A sexually aggressive woman is a “cougar.”  Snooty woman is considered to be “catty.” A sexually attractive woman is a “sex kitten.” A woman’s genitalia is a “pussy.” A scrap between two women is called a “cat fight,” and when a woman uses her nails as a weapon, they are referred to as “claws.”

The association between women and cats seem to stem from cultural assumptions about feline traits and stereotypical feminine behaviour. Both cats and women are viewed as inherently sly, detached, aloof, territorial, unpredictable, and they both pretend that they don’t poop.

Not surprising, the rival between the two most popular domesticated pets, cats and dogs, seems to sit in alignment to men and women’s stereotypical gender differences. It is suggested that men’s preference for dogs is based on the canine’s doting enthrallment with their owner. [Please insert your own hypocritically sexist joke about the male ego here]. In essence, the correlation between men and dogs is also weighted in cultural gender stereotypes. Theorists specializing in Kitty Awesomeness 101 propose that a contributing factor to the everyday bullying of the female/ feline relationship is the underlying threat that women are using cats to compensate for loneliness. Cats have become a widely recognized symbol of a women’s independence, and are being perceived as a substitute for intimate partners and children. One must wonder if cats’ lowly rate on the cool scale is reflective of our systemic devalue of women and femininity, similar to how a male child who is dressed in feminine clothing is scorned, but the young female “tomboy” is still worthy of social respect.

The feline’s negative reputation, which may or may not be related to their so-called sassy, female BFFs, has long characterized them as being arrogant and only wanting food and elite, indoor kitty comforts, like catnip, plastic bags with the handles cut out to avoid injury, and crumpled up balls of paper. However, a study that was accepted earlier this year for publication in the Journal of Behavioural Processes reports that felines are, indeed, engaging, interactive fur-buddies who develop real bonds with their owners. The study also backs up the assumption that cats share a particularly intense bond with their female owners, which is explained by women’s higher interaction with their cats. Although cats are notoriously known to be harder to swoon than the average household dog, this research theorizes that cats remember the kindness and attention given to them by particular people, and will be more inclined to initiate interaction with those people later on.

For those of us who are cat people, the findings of this study may seem one-dimensional and obvious, but given the ongoing misconceptions about the nature of cats, and more specifically, the mystery surrounding women’s relationship with them, it is evident that such research is needed to debunk some of these negative assumptions. Instead of mocking “cat ladies,” maybe we should be giving men sympathy for lagging behind in feline attachment skills and missing out on the joys of the feline. But fear not, it has been reported that there has been a rise in the number of men adopting cats. Do I smell the Whitefish and Tuna scent of man-love-kitty liberation, brochachos?

Contact the author here: lojomanifesto@morningquickie.com