Why Pan Am Failed To Inspire Me

Considering the first episode of Pan Am involved a flight attendant (Laura, The Clever One) being recruited to work for the CIA, I hoped for lots of deconstruction of Cold War propaganda and such like.

No luck.

Kate (The Pretty One) runs away from her wedding in a less-than-compelling flashback sequence. This is meant to symbolize the “new woman” the Pan Am girl is meant to be. Bollocks to weddings, let’s travel the world. A great sentiment, which I hoped the series would explore a bit.

Again, no luck.

All French women are called Collette and have a dark past, a fact this series takes to heart. Collette (The French One) has some sex and then reminds us that this series is set not so very long after the Second World War, by staging a ludicrous confrontation between The French One and some German diplomats after Kennedy’s famous “I Am A Doughnut” speech.

Maggie (The Bad One) is a Democrat.

In a very realistic representation of 1960s Berlin, this episode had The Pretty One, The French One and The Bad One running through the streets, where everyone was waving American flags, to hear Kennedy on a TV. Meanwhile The Clever One was attempting to rescue another spy (my goodness, they made pretty spies in the 60s) by smuggling her into the American embassy in a flight attendant’s uniform.

The Clever One was told off for that, later.

The Clever One has a splendid affair with Luka from ER, who in this situation is a Yugoslavian diplomat (Communist! Communist!) she’s trying to entice into the wholesome world of the CIA.

The Bad One gets in trouble a lot, mainly because she doesn’t like her girdle.

The Pretty One has vague sex with an African American sailor. (Interacial! Interacial!) He’s beaten up for hanging out with her and the landlord gets annoyed because he’s walking around the flat topless. This reminds us that things were different in the 1960s.

The French One has a heart of gold, despite being French.

The plots mostly involve women sashaying up and down an airplane aisle in pencil skirts. And wiggling out of their standard-issue girdles in the washroom. And drinking tequila and that sort of thing. Amazingly, they always end up brushing shapely hips with key world events linked with US history. The Bay of Pigs, for example. Sometimes their hair gets tousled and their pristine white blouses become ruffled, but in the end the Pan Am girls maintain their famous poise.

It’s a lost chance to subvert the American Dream and a sadly ruined opportunity to reinvent the pencil skirt.

Contact the author here: miriam@morningquickie.com