This Fall, The Bachelor Takes On Canada

For better or for worse, the popular franchise The Bachelor will come to Canada in the fall of 2012.

Although it was only announced this past Monday, casting begins now. Let’s hope the one hunky man and his Canadian pick really fall in love and make it work — which would be contrary to the usual unravelling of each relationship after taping is done and real life returns with full force. It could have something to do with the fact that the man who chose you over everyone else made out with every other girl before he made his well-informed decision. No matter what tools you’re using to dissect the show it doesn’t seem likely that the fairytale will last.

Despite multiple failures over 22 seasons, let’s side with optimism for a moment. Maybe, just maybe, it will be more effective in Canada. There’s must be a method underneath all the madness.

But the real question hanging over our heads is: is it good or bad that The Bachelor franchise is extending its tentacles, attempting to grasp its northern neighbour?

It’s time to weigh the pros and cons. It’s like when Mr. Bachelor himself can’t decide between the blonde or the brunette. He either makes a list or tosses a coin, I’m not sure which. In this pop culture minefield, will The Bachelor Canada hit a landmine and fall to pieces, or will it manage to dodge the bombs?

Pros:

1) Canada’s Peaks and Valleys:

It seems to me that the show is as much about landscapes as it is about love. While the women always characterize their experience as a “fairytale,” it’s more like a lavish vacation where you get to go to places you can’t afford in real life. This week on the US version, they went to Park City, Utah, and it was breathtakingly beautiful. While Ben was riding in on a horse like a “knight in shining armour,” I was just observing the serene mountainous backdrop that looked like something out of a movie. So just imagine the possibilities in Canada! One person on Twitter said, “Romantic getaways to Tremblant or Whistler, or, if cheap Bachelor…. Blue Mountain. Beavertails for dessert.” If they do have the budget for it, we are destined to see Canada shine in all its glory.

2) Canada’s Other Peaks and Valleys:

Hot Canadian women can stop hiding behind their computers. It’s not like beautiful women need help meeting a man, but I still find that so many are resorting to online dating to find a suitable mate. And it’s not a bad thing, but if you’re good-looking and your boss allows you some time off to travel and be on television — with the glimmer of hope you will find your main man — why not? And, as Beyoncé says, “if you like it put a ring on it.” The show is able to eliminate the drawn out courtship that most of us experience.

Plus, these 25 single ladies offer us rivalries and their often erratic behaviour makes it fun for us to tune in. They live up to the previews promising viewers the “most dramatic season EVER!”

Needless to say, nature lovers may opt to watch for the stunning scenery, hopeless romantics watch the show hoping for a real love connection, some will watch it just for shits and giggles, and men may suck it up to watch it with their wives or girlfriends for the eye candy it provides. Gentlemen, there are revealing evening gowns each episode and bikinis (it seems) every other week!

3) Hot Men Around the Corner:

Where there’s a bachelor there’s bound to be a bachelorette right around the corner. This means we could be in for 25 smokin’ hot men. Oh yes.

Cons:

1) Pervasive Stereotypes and Bad Editing:

Eh. Hockey. Cold weather. Celine Dion. Is this what we’re in for? Please, no. First and foremost, The Bachelor is a romance. However insanely unrealistic it may be, it’s meant to make us all believe in love. Hopefully the show creators stick to the dating script as opposed to the comedy. It’s a lot to ask, but I pray it’s not too hokey and keeps the Canadian-isms at bay.

But stereotypes are already brewing. Again, take Twitter. One woman writes: “I have a pal who wants to audition for #thebachelorcanada. She needs an audition vid. I see hockey skates and a bikini… other suggestions?” A man asks, “Pucks instead of roses?” I can’t help but cringe. Do American women suit up in football gear for their auditions? Good God. Many Canadians love hockey, yet other sports do in fact exist. Anyway, a bikini audition is pretty demeaning.

At least your audition won’t be scrutinized by thousands of people (well, not that I know of), but I can’t say the same for the actual show. Anything you say or do could easily be taken out of context. One woman is usually the villan. She’s isolated and pitted against 24 other fierce competitors with no hope in the world of being thrown a life raft. Even if you’re not cast as everyone’s arch-enemy, the majority of women on the show are still portrayed as catty, petty and emotionally unbalanced. Most are inaccurate representations, but still, do you really want to watch a show that puts women in such a negative light?

2) Love in a Hopeless Place:

At this point I could go into a full-fledged Bachelor rant but I will refrain. Out of 22 seasons, only 3 couples are still together. It’s a rough terrain where the couples get blinded with bright media headlights and never recover.

3) Bachelor Pad:

It’s another spin-off of the franchise and it’s just like witnessing a big orgy unfold, not to mention it unleashes the most hellish emotions on earth. People become scheming, lying, manipulating, cheating and sexed-up human bodies devoid of soul.

On the bright side, The Bachelor is “reality” with many grains of salt and we just can’t take it all that seriously. People decide to go on the show knowing full well they could become pawns in a game of chess where there can only be one King and Queen (who are subsequently obliterated themselves).

So at the end of the day it seems we’re tied 3-3. Shootout?

Contact the author here: tinybart@morningquickie.com